Confessions of a Traditional Wife
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Submitting From Afar...

29/3/2009

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In a few days, my Husband will be away at a work-related conference and we'll be apart. This part of his job is not fun for me, although it's a great, prestigious thing for him, of course; and I am thoroughly supportive of him. My Husband really is awesome at what he does. :) However, it's always hard to be apart. Compile on top of that the fact that we have house guests currently, and as soon as they leave, so does my husband. I'm actually going to visit my family while he's gone, and then we're coming back to where my Husband and I live. This will be pleasant to have my parents visit for a week... I've missed them terribly (I'm a big "daddy's girl!" :):) Anyhow, it makes "alone time" with my Husband almost non-existent for the next two weeks.

Beyond the *obvious* dilemma with the lack of alone time *grin*, it also means that we also won't have any time for our regular disciplinary routines. Maybe that's a good thing, and an opportunity to really practice the virtue of obedience, but when I don't get a daily spanking-- or at *least* a daily few swats on the tush, I start to get more lax. And when I'm around my mother... let's just say I either end up earning a spanking or need a stress-relief one! ;-)

My Husband, mindful of our brief separation, and subsequent lack of privacy, set up a nifty little weekly system. So of course, I am going to stick to that, and I do truly desire to be good, no matter what. I'm mindful of a great quote from "The Nun's Story": "At the end of the day... you can cheat [others] and yourself, but you can never cheat God."

So to others who life this lifestyle... here's a question for feedback: If you are the Head of Household, what do you do to help keep your little woman at home mindful of your presence when you are gone? To the women, is there anything special that you do to remind yourself of, or to practice submission, to your HOH when you're apart?

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"Oh Be Careful Little Mouth What You Say..."

25/3/2009

6 Comments

 

I learned that line from a little cheery song as a kid in Sunday School, but I wish I had recalled it, and what is more, put it into practice last night. Life was running along smoothly up until then, as it always seems to, until the volcano explodes. I was feeling very good about my accomplishments and growth. Then, I met the "Aspartame Fascist." (For those of you who aren't familiar with Aspartame, pronounced more like "Asper-tame," it's a brand of synthetic sweeter.)

My husband and I went to the store in the early evening to grab a few items, and while we were there, I remembered that I was running out of yogurt. So I went, amiably, to see what random assortment of flavors awaited me. I was delighted! The fat-free Yoplait yogurts, I noticed, happened to specifically announce that they're gluten-free on the back. And I loved several of the flavors. I picked up a couple of the Boston Cream-- my absolute favorites-- and noticed that there were other yummy looking flavors, too, like Strawberry Shortcake and Key Lime Pie. I was in heaven!

And then a sharp, nasally voice near me broke through my fond thoughts. In an italicized superior tone, a woman next to me announced-- because it really wasn't a question-- "So, you like your ASPARTAME, huh?" I couldn't have been more stunned if she'd slapped me. I'm usually a more shy person, and shrink away from confrontation. However, I collected myself and stood my ground.

"I like that it's *gluten-free*." The woman next to me muttered incoherently to herself, so I thought the moment had passed. I was not thus to be so lucky. She, again, took it upon herself to interrupt my thoughts.

"Gluten-free... gluten-free...You're allergic to gluten?!" 

Still wondering why this lady is taking it upon herself to have a vested interest in my Yoplait yogurt choices, I responded that why yes, I was allergic to gluten.

Again, more mumbling. Then I realized she'd said something that she obviously expected me to answer. She repeated herself. "What is gluten" Is it dairy-related?" Yes, I thought, that's exactly why I'm buying Yogurt. *rolls eyes*

"Gluten is found in wheat, oats, barley, rye..."

"Well," she deigned to oblige me this concession, "I suppose that's different."

Now, I was trying to be nice, but my temper was a bit flared at this point, and so I responded in italics, "I don't particularly care for Aspartame, but the NON-Fat-free version is not gluten-free. " ...Whereby I proceeded to show the woman the back of the labels... showing her the "gluten-free" label on the blue version vs. the not-existent label on the "pink label," slightly more fuller fat version. She was dumbfounded over this.

"Well, I read somewhere about Aspartame... " More random muttering about the evils of Aspartame.

At this point, my husband came back over and I started to walk away with him, the Aspartame Lady sort of following us. I quietly explained to him that I didn't even want the yogurts anymore... However, the woman, clearly following our conversation-- which is admirable, considering that I have a very quiet voice-- smugly finished my sentence, "Now that I'VE Added my two cents, huh?"

I didn't end up buying the yogurt. I asked my husband go put it back for me, since I couldn't have enjoyed it then. It's so funny now, but I was *not* a happy camper by any means at the time. Nobody gets between me and my gluten-free, fat-free yogurt, especially when I'm still in the negative caloric count from working out in the gym. The nerve of that woman! I think if I could do it all over again, I'd give the crazy woman a big smile and be like "MMMMMMM, Ymmmm, ASPARTAME!" ;-)

However, by the time my husband and I had reached the parking lot, I'd completely lost it. I was so mad, I used several colorful phrases to describe that meddling busybody-- words I hadn't used, even thought of, in a very long time. My husband's eyes flashed dangerously, but I was beyond caring. A few more strings of harsh adjectives and I'd calmed down enough to realize how much trouble I was in. That realization cooled me down completely. I blanched as my husband held the car door open, and remained fairly quiet the rest of the way home.

In the time between the store and our home, I was so furious, I started to cry silent and hot tears. (Sadly, this is the only time I ever cry... when I'm mad.) Then, it suddenly dawned on me why the whole stupid incident bothered me so much. The woman was like my mother. Growing up, everything I had done had been wrong, or inadequate, or something along the lines of "you know, honey, if you had done it *this* way..." My mother was the superior type who always inserted herself into random people's conversations or personal situations, feeling that her calling in life was to make sure people kept from making the wrong decisions... usually their own... and saw the light. Nevertheless, I knew that this in no way exonerated my horrid behavior.

At home, my husband and I had a little conversation, in which I shared these things with him. Nevertheless, our talk was thus followed by a very somber session over his knee. Until he could find proper soap-- and he assured me that he *would* find the Miracle soap that had been recommended-- the sting of the spanking would have to suffice. Lest anyone thing him too merciful in this, because to me a mere spanking would seem to be more than lenient, let me assure my reader that by the time it was over, my bottom and thighs (a very, very tender spot for me) had been thoroughly chastised. I never beg my husband to stop, but I did so several times before it was over. The last time I asked, my husband had, gently but firmly, gathered up my long hair in his grasp and pulled my head closer to his. His eyes were loving, but very firm. With his free hand, he put a single finger over his lips, indicating no more requests. It was hard to do, but I complied, and tried very hard to give myself over to the correction. Several whimpers and half-sobs still tore from my throat.

I learned an important lesson, though: Be careful, little mouth, what you say.

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Examples of Submission and Discipline in Sacred Scripture

23/3/2009

3 Comments

 

~ Submission ~


* Job 22:21 -  "Submit thyself then to Him (to God), and be at peace: and thereby thou shalt have the best fruits."

* Ecclesiasticus (Sirach) 51:34 --
"And submit your neck to the yoke, and let your soul receive discipline: for she is near at hand to be found."

* Romans 13:1 -- "Let every soul be subject to higher powers: for there is no power but from God: and those that are, are ordained of God."

* Ephesians 5:22-25; 33 -- "Let women be subject to their husbands, as to the Lord: Because the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church. He is the saviour of his body. Therefore as the church is subject to Christ, so also let the wives be to their husbands in all things. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ also loved the church, and delivered himself up for it... Nevertheless let every one of you in particular love his wife as himself: and let the wife fear her husband."

* Colossians 3:18 -- "Wives, be subject to your husbands, as it behoveth in the Lord."

* 1 Peter 3: 1 -- "In like manner also let wives be subject to their husbands: that if any believe not the word, they may be won without the word, by the conversation of the wives."

* 1 Peter 3:6 -- "As Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters you are, doing well, and not fearing any disturbance."

* Romans 7:2 -- "For the woman that hath an husband, whilst her husband liveth is bound to the law. But if her husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband."

1 Corinthians 7:34 -- "And the unmarried woman and the virgin thinketh on the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she that is married thinketh on the things of the world, how she may please her husband."

Titus 2:4-5 -- "That they (older Christian women) may teach the young women to be wise, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, sober, having a care of the house, gentle, obedient to their husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."



~ Discipline ~


* Psalms 2:12 -- "Embrace discipline, lest at any time the Lord be angry, and you perish from the just way."

* Psalms 17:36 -- "And thou hast given me the protection of thy salvation: and thy right hand hath held me up: And thy discipline hath corrected me unto the end: and thy discipline, the same shall teach me."

* Psalms 118:66 -- "Teach me goodness and discipline and knowledge; for I have believed thy commandments."

* Wisdom 3:11 -- "For he that rejecteth wisdom, and discipline, is unhappy: and their hope is vain, and their labours without fruit, and their works unprofitable."

* Wisdom 6:19 -- "And the care of discipline is love: and love is the keeping of her laws: and the keeping of her laws is the firm foundation of incorruption:"

* Ecclesiasticus 1:34 -- "For the fear of the Lord is wisdom and discipline: and that which is agreeable to him,"

* Ecclesiasticus 16:24 -- "Hearken to me, my son, and learn the discipline of understanding, and attend to my words in thy heart."

* Ecclesiasticus 26: 17 -- "Her discipline is the gift of God."

* Ecclesiasticus 32:18 -- "He that feareth the Lord, will receive his discipline: and they that will seek him early, shall find a blessing."

* Phillipians 4:8 -- "For the rest, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever modest, whatsoever just, whatsoever holy, whatsoever lovely, whatsoever of good fame, if there be any virtue, if any praise of discipline, think on these things."

* Hebrews 12: 5-15 -- "And you have forgotten the consolation, which speaketh to you, as unto children, saying: My son, neglect not the discipline of the Lord; neither be thou wearied whilst thou art rebuked by him. For whom the Lord loveth, he chastiseth; and he scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. Persevere under discipline. God dealeth with you as with his sons; for what son is there, whom the father doth not correct? But if you be without chastisement, whereof all are made partakers, then are you bastards, and not sons. Moreover we have had fathers of our flesh, for instructors, and we reverenced them: shall we not much more obey the Father of spirits, and live? And they indeed for a few days, according to their own pleasure, instructed us: but he, for our profit, that we might receive his sanctification. Now all chastisement for the present indeed seemeth not to bring with it joy, but sorrow: but afterwards it will yield, to them that are exercised by it, the most peaceable fruit of justice. Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees, And make straight steps with your feet: that no one, halting, may go out of the way; but rather be healed. Follow peace with all men, and holiness: without which no man shall see God. Looking diligently, lest any man be wanting to the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up do hinder, and by it many be defiled."




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In Everything, Give Praise!

21/3/2009

3 Comments

 

The past several weeks have been utterly crazy. :) I worked full-time, finished up my university coursework for my classes (I am also a full-time student through an online, distance learning program), and then had a week off to visit friends and extended family. The week off was absolutely wonderful! It was originally going to be just for the weekend, for a retreat with my friends from my previous university, but it extended into a trip to visit my extended family in the area, and then I ended up staying with a sweet friend of mine and her family. It was very much a spiritual retreat time, and although I missed my husband terribly, so much grace came from the week. :)

When I came back, my husband enacted a more intensive training program for me. I began praying my daily prayers and my spiritual reading ("Holiness for Housewives"), and crazy things started happening! LOL

First, I fully surrendered to the guidance of the Spiritual Reading. I began to look at my life as my own unique vocation-- something not to be compared with anyone else's-- and to see everything in it as my own particular way to sanctity. It completely changed my outlook on my coursework and job. God also provided me the grace to be able to obey my husband in a more tangible way: I went into work on the following Tuesday and at the end of the day, was layed off. This was not of my own accord, and my boss reassured me that if circumstances changed any, I would be the first to know, and could have my job back. So, I became again became a stay-at-home wife! Which is exactly what my husband had been desiring for some time. I had truly wanted to do his will, but had been torn between my obligation for the family I worked for, as taking the job had been their answer to prayer, and finding the right time to be able to obey my husband and quit. Amazing to see how God worked it out for me! :)

So now I am a housewife again. YAY! Now I can wake up, work out at the gym, devote my full attention (as opposed to my half-hearted, stressed, and exhausted attention, lol) to coursework during the day. The moment my husband walks through the door, I'm all his! I'm so excited to greet him when he walks through our doorway! Then I hop back into the kitchen to finish dinner! After his breif relaxation and respite from the stresses of the day, we enjoy one another's company over a simple meal. Evenings are spent in the enjoyment of one another... either cuddling or some instance of my training. Oh, it is truly a blessing to be a stay-at-home, Traditional wife!!! *grin!!!*

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Baby Steps

5/3/2009

0 Comments

 

My Lord God, I will strive to serve Thee in Holy Obedience through the means which Thou hast seen fit to place over my soul. Thank You for your Grace and Your Love. Help me to grow in Holy Obedience. I can do nothing apart free Thee.

Nevertheless, My God, who art good and deserving of all my love, break me gently, lest I be reduced to nothing.

Sancta Maria, ora pro nobis. Amen.

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